Sunday, June 28, 2009
i would give anything just to see that shocked face expression again. that made my day!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
today's prolly one of the happiest days of this winter break. the sun was shining today, i woke early to meet mark and jess and kari and van and evelynn to skate. was really fun to catch up with people u grew up with. 10 years have passed since we first knew one another, on the rink. those nostalgic times of competing, travelling, training, falling, landing those jumps, ... now we've all grown up, suck so badly at skating now if cai shu were here, she'll shake her head.
met the RE people after for dinner. had xlb and la mian at imperial treasure, and then we headed off to tcc for some desserts and more catching up time. it just dawned upon me that the pursuit for happyness is actually very easy. i told sam that it's just the gathering of a few friends that you really cherish and love, sharing and filling out the missing pages in one another's lives and doing some silly things together, pretending that the world revolves only around us, abandon those cares and worries, and a moment later, you become light headed with the immense joy and euphoria derived from the sheer bonds that have been reconnected. that dinner made me really really happy.
when i reached home, i raced to order my macbook pro. it's coming in 3 days! im so excited, i was going to go out to run away the excitement!
CEL IS HAPPY TODAY.
I discovered that the pursuit for happyness is actually really easy Ü
Monday, June 15, 2009
i don't understand. i don't understand why there are some guys out there who are sooooo nice, yet they seek girls that can't even be bothered much about them, or in any case, are just empty vessels without much intelligence, character, personality or even skills. they're just pretty, or skinny, and that's all the nice guys are attracted to. what sort of world do we live in these days?
Monday, June 08, 2009
This seems more me!
As an ESTJ, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things rationally and logically. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion.
ESTJs live in a world of facts and concrete needs. They live in the present, with their eye constantly scanning their personal environment to make sure that everything is running smoothly and systematically. They honor traditions and laws, and have a clear set of standards and beliefs. They expect the same of others, and have no patience or understanding of individuals who do not value these systems. They value competence and efficiency, and like to see quick results for their efforts.
ESTJs are take-charge people. They have such a clear vision of the way that things should be, that they naturally step into leadership roles. They are self-confident and aggressive. They are extremely talented at devising systems and plans for action, and at being able to see what steps need to be taken to complete a specific task. They can sometimes be very demanding and critical, because they have such strongly held beliefs, and are likely to express themselves without reserve if they feel someone isn't meeting their standards. But at least their expressions can be taken at face-value, because the ESTJ is extremely straight-forward and honest.
The ESTJ is usually a model citizen, and pillar of the community. He or she takes their commitments seriously, and follows their own standards of "good citizenship" to the letter. ESTJ enjoys interacting with people, and likes to have fun. ESTJs can be very boisterous and fun at social events, especially activities which are focused on the family, community, or work.
The ESTJ needs to watch out for the tendency to be too rigid, and to become overly detail-oriented. Since they put a lot of weight in their own beliefs, it's important that they remember to value other people's input and opinions. If they neglect their Feeling side, they may have a problem with fulfilling other's needs for intimacy, and may unknowingly hurt people's feelings by applying logic and reason to situations which demand more emotional sensitivity.
When bogged down by stress, an ESTJ often feels isolated from others. They feel as if they are misunderstood and undervalued, and that their efforts are taken for granted. Although normally the ESTJ is very verbal and doesn't have any problem expressing themself, when under stress they have a hard time putting their feelings into words and communicating them to others.
ESTJs value security and social order above all else, and feel obligated to do all that they can to enhance and promote these goals. They will mow the lawn, vote, join the PTA, attend home owners association meetings, and generally do anything that they can to promote personal and social security.
The ESTJ puts forth a lot of effort in almost everything that they do. They will do everything that they think should be done in their job, marriage, and community with a good amount of energy. He or she is conscientious, practical, realistic, and dependable. While the ESTJ will dutifully do everything that is important to work towards a particular cause or goal, they might not naturally see or value the importance of goals which are outside of their practical scope. However, if the ESTJ is able to see the relevance of such goals to practical concerns, you can bet that they'll put every effort into understanding them and incorporating them into their quest for clarity and security.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will.
Romans 8: 26 - 27
I'm starting to get a bit scared. Just when i was talking to Sally and Rena this morning about how I feel noob about praying with the older people, and about how I don't really know how to pray as pro as others, this appeared to me. It wasn't coincidental, I think. Masterlife lying on the floor in the same exact position it was at cell last night, in my sight of view. I decided to read through masterlife, cuz i was a little bored, so i turned on some hillsongs, started reading day 4 of week 3, and i discovered this verse. Indeed I do not know what to pray for at most times, but I feel empowered by the Holy Spirit this week. I started to pray more, I know a bit more about what to pray for, and it's just becoming a 2 way communication, coupled with the Holy Spirit prompting me on what to pray for.
On tuesday I learnt that "If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer." This was also really mighty, because Gen said that prayer is a 2 way communication. I guess it didn't really daunt on me that it's 2 way, but now I'm starting to feel the 2 way communication. A little opening up to the Holy Spirit, and revelation will come. I'm getting scared though, cuz this is getting really quite real, and this is probably the 1st time in life I'm hearing things so clearly from God. I don't really know how to react...
1 good thing that happened today was getting the dreaded iphone issue fixed. Finally put in the proof of purchase with the sim card holder and I'm eager to receive a new Iphone! Thank God that service is one of the spiritual gifts. I like! Ü
3:47 PM
ESFJ Ü
The Caregiver
As an ESFJ, your primary mode of living is focused externally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit in with your personal value system. Your secondary mode is internal, where you take things in via your five senses in a literal, concrete fashion.
ESFJs are people persons - they love people. They are warmly interested in others. They use their Sensing and Judging characteristics to gather specific, detailed information about others, and turn this information into supportive judgments. They want to like people, and have a special skill at bringing out the best in others. They are extremely good at reading others, and understanding their point of view. The ESFJ's strong desire to be liked and for everything to be pleasant makes them highly supportive of others. People like to be around ESFJs, because the ESFJ has a special gift of invariably making people feel good about themselves.
The ESFJ takes their responsibilities very seriously, and is very dependable. They value security and stability, and have a strong focus on the details of life. They see before others do what needs to be done, and do whatever it takes to make sure that it gets done. They enjoy these types of tasks, and are extremely good at them.
ESFJs are warm and energetic. They need approval from others to feel good about themselves. They are hurt by indifference and don't understand unkindness. They are very giving people, who get a lot of their personal satisfaction from the happiness of others. They want to be appreciated for who they are, and what they give. They're very sensitive to others, and freely give practical care. ESFJs are such caring individuals, that they sometimes have a hard time seeing or accepting a difficult truth about someone they care about.
With Extraverted Feeling dominating their personality, ESFJs are focused on reading other people. They have a strong need to be liked, and to be in control. They are extremely good at reading others, and often change their own manner to be more pleasing to whoever they're with at the moment.
The ESFJ's value system is defined externally. They usually have very well-formed ideas about the way things should be, and are not shy about expressing these opinions. However, they weigh their values and morals against the world around them, rather than against an internal value system. They may have a strong moral code, but it is defined by the community that they live in, rather than by any strongly felt internal values.
ESFJs who have had the benefit of being raised and surrounded by a strong value system that is ethical and centered around genuine goodness will most likely be the kindest, most generous souls who will gladly give you the shirt off of their back without a second thought. For these individuals, the selfless quality of their personality type is genuine and pure. ESFJs who have not had the advantage of developing their own values by weighing them against a good external value system may develop very questionable values. In such cases, the ESFJ most often genuinely believes in the integrity of their skewed value system. They have no internal understanding of values to set them straight. In weighing their values against our society, they find plenty of support for whatever moral transgression they wish to justify. This type of ESFJ is a dangerous person indeed. Extraverted Feeling drives them to control and manipulate, and their lack of Intuition prevents them from seeing the big picture. They're usually quite popular and good with people, and good at manipulating them. Unlike their ENFJ cousin, they don't have Intuition to help them understand the real consequences of their actions. They are driven to manipulate other to achieve their own ends, yet they believe that they are following a solid moral code of conduct.
All ESFJs have a natural tendency to want to control their environment. Their dominant function demands structure and organization, and seeks closure. ESFJs are most comfortable with structured environments. They're not likely to enjoy having to do things which involve abstract, theoretical concepts, or impersonal analysis. They do enjoy creating order and structure, and are very good at tasks which require these kinds of skills. ESFJs should be careful about controling people in their lives who do not wish to be controlled.
ESFJs respect and believe in the laws and rules of authority, and believe that others should do so as well. They're traditional, and prefer to do things in the established way, rather than venturing into unchartered territory. Their need for security drives their ready acceptance and adherence to the policies of the established system. This tendency may cause them to sometimes blindly accept rules without questioning or understanding them.
An ESFJ who has developed in a less than ideal way may be prone to being quite insecure, and focus all of their attention on pleasing others. He or she might also be very controling, or overly sensitive, imagining bad intentions when there weren't any.
ESFJs incorporate many of the traits that are associated with women in our society. However, male ESFJs will usually not appear feminine at all. On the contrary, ESFJs are typically quite conscious about gender roles and will be most comfortable playing a role that suits their gender in our society. Male ESFJs will be quite masculine (albeit sensitive when you get to know them), and female ESFJs will be very feminine.
ESFJs at their best are warm, sympathetic, helpful, cooperative, tactful, down-to-earth, practical, thorough, consistent, organized, enthusiastic, and energetic. They enjoy tradition and security, and will seek stable lives that are rich in contact with friends and family.
Saturday, May 16, 2009
I hate it when people around me are not happy, or are troubled. it just makes me feel crappy cuz i can't seem to do anything to make them happier and i feel troubled with them when they r troubled.. the least i could do was to hear them out, let them tell me about their problems, but i can't solve them. if i could, i think i'll be God then. haha but seriously, why do all the nice people get into all these shits?
what is this that moulin rouge raves about;
the best thing in the world is to love and be loved?
this is such a silly ideology. the greatest pain on earth is to love someone wholeheartedly, but know that you'll never get back that same kind of love. that is the tragedy in life. u try, u please, u accomodate, u sacrifice, u . . . but in the end, the response is still the same. so why would u wanna put yourself into that pithole?
if there's one thing i learnt from all these friends this week, it is to not trust in love. im not being pessimistic, but honestly, to me, the only way you'll not get hurt is just not to let yourself think about wanting to be with the person, and essentially, totally stop loving the person in a different way from being friends. don't narrow your own horizons and arrow that one fish in the ocean. there are heaps of fish in the ocean and u never know, some other fish might come in your way and sweep you off the boat and surprise u.
it's so easy to just sit and say these things, but i hope i'll be able to learn all of these, and make myself stronger.
CAN'T LIFE BE SIMPLER? free from all these spastic things, cuz at the end of the day, you'll be thinking, danggg that was really stupid, and i wasted my life thinking n doing things about it.
SIGH. bad week.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
When God reveals, He really makes it obvious to you it's scary. I remember the story of the wool that remained dry and untouched by the morning dew. Not once, not twice but three times in the day - whether through people, dreams or just making me restless in bed with the thoughts, when all i wanted was just to sleep after a long day. He really woke me, metaphorically and physically. I knew it was real because it was blatantly in my face. I knew it was real because I've prayed for it to happen.
God, i just pray that You'll help me to follow your ways. Let Your will be done through me. Teach me to be patient and wait upon You.
